I love looking at all the posts for our family. I laugh, I cry and I think I need to get with it and post something for posterity and for myself. I am afraid of pictures. Each time I post a picture I mess it up. So I will write just a little, until I can talk Adrie and Matt in to teaching me better skills.
In Relief Society, the lesson was on the letters of Joseph Smith to his family. I thought maybe I should muse a little about my family in letters now and again about the joys of being the Mom, wife, and grandmother of this crew for my family to read.
Dear Family
Some 40- 45 years ago, (boy that really dates me) I used to think and dream a little about being a wife of a really good, kind man (in those days I thought of HIM more as a cute, fun, nice boy). I think I wanted to be a MOM from the moment I could conceptualize the thought. But, even until now I didn't have a clue what that all entailed. I thought of the fun of dressing, doing hair, going to the park, holding, rocking and singing songs. I loved the idea of having my own family, and the pictures were all of clean, smiling faces without cares or skinned knees. There was no sadness or sickness or things going wrong. And being the control freak, (I didn’t know I was at that point) things always went the way I planned and everyone wanted them that way.
I pictured green trees with blue skies and warm weather (not hot) (or cold) everyday. My yard, my house and of course the garage were always painted and clean and everything was in its place.
As I write this little ditty, I look outside my window to the falling yellow leaves, bright orange trees and blue mountains. The sky is covered with gray and white clouds with only speckles of blue. I can't help but think this sight out of my window is even better than the “perfect” day that I imagined.
Yesterday, Ray Lynn spent a good share of a Saturday helping me create a dream that had been in my head ever since we built this house. I wanted a raised flower garden in front of the porch. As it is with so many of my desires, they are totally impossible if left to my own abilities. A few months ago, Ray Lynn poured a wall around the area that had been in my mind for twenty years. It was in the middle of the hot summer, and so I told him it wasn’t the time for us to worry about doing any more. About a month ago, he helped (or maybe I should say I helped him a little) with moving all the iris and daylilies and replanting them in the back yard. When you are working with Lake Shore clay, it is like working with concrete. And my man has experience in the cement world. October 18, 2008 was very probably the last 70 degree day we would have. So Ray Lynn hooked on the trailer to the truck and off to Olsen’s we went to load up 2 yards of top soil. We wandered through the plants that we could choose from for a fall planting and still enjoy the benefits in the spring.
Ray Lynn and I have a good deal of things in common, but we are exact opposites in some areas. My hubby loves everything to be square and straight, in neat little lines with coordinating colors. I have no use for anything that isn’t curvy and rounded. I like every possible color in the rainbow. (Sorry, Nicole, you are just like Grandma-we both like things to be colorful.) I picked out a wide variety of pansies in all colors. I restrained myself from purchasing the “Halloween Peek a Boos” (bright orange) just for Ray Lynn’s sake. The Kale (flowering cabbages) drew my attention, and I purchased 6 with differing colors. Ray Lynn didn’t say too much; he just let me go about my bidding. But as we began looking at the tulip, daffodil and hyacinth bulbs, he suggested that we might like to have rows of the tallest in the back and moving forward. He said we could have a row of each kind and that we would probably need about 5 or 6 differing kinds. I thought to myself, for once you should let him have a say in the flowers. So I tried to simply say, which kind would you like, which ones would you choose, do you like these bulbs. I was really quite proud of myself, because I thought I was able to let him choose just exactly what he wanted. We came home with 10 of 5 different kinds of bulbs. If I had been the one picking, I would have come home with 2 of 25 different kinds.
We came home from Olsen’s and with John’s help, we unloaded our 2 yards of top soil and then went to the land fill to purchase 3 yards of “black gold” mulch (or in John’s words poop dirt—it is sterilized). Once again Ray Lynn and John unloaded the mulch (I was helping by raking the dirt around the area). I began asking Ray Lynn how he wanted to plant his flowers, and he told me that I could do it however I wanted, since he hadn’t got to do it how he wanted. (He wasn’t saying it rudely, or mean—just matter of fact.) I was surprised because I thought we had picked just what he wanted. I never did get him to tell me what he would have chosen. But, we proceeded to plant the cabbages and bulbs in 5 straight rows and then added the pansies to each row.
It looks beautiful. My dream comes true. I have a beautiful raised flower bed in front of my porch. Even better, I am the wife of a really good, kind man. He helps my dreams come true. Without him, I couldn’t do many of the things I dream about. And those little things like straight vs. curvy, and order vs. variety is the things that make us very compatible and life very interesting.
